I appreciate your perspective, as I have mine. It just doesn’t bother me like it does others (as mentioned). kevin has proven himself time and again to be a very worthy contributor. I just feel the lack of his presence is a loss for me personally.
kevin might not be a Hemingway or Mailer, but these guys and many others were known to have potty mouths that probably didn’t diminish their pieces. I know that separating the two sides of kevin’s writing styles on this forum is not as easy as it would be for a published writer’s casual conversations v. their pieces. But I personally can accept the fact that the human animal is of more than one dimension and kevin has no issues showing us more than one, unlike most of the rest of us. The F-bomb kevin is the hard-drinking joking kevin with some swagger. The serious pen-to-paper kevin sits at his candle-lit desk pondering how to put his love for a place, a time, a reason into words that roll like parables from a sage.
There’s a browser add-on that filters cuss-words. Just for laughs, I installed it and customized it to replace the f-word with Fuddruckers. I think Kevin would approve.
Great authors don’t use profanity on a continuous basis but use it selectively to underscore their key points. Kevin was just the opposite like a small child who desperately looked for attention by using fuck in every sentence without being funny or clever but just boring after a very short period of time. There might be very interesting information in some of his posts but many people will never read it as it is hard (and not worth) to look for the few diamonds in a sea of shit. (And not unlike a small child I expect that he will come back once he isn’t any longer “offended” that his “parents” had a “serious discussion” with him)
I read over them but find it odd that somehow the blame in this issue is put more on people that don’t like his style instead on him to react in this way on a very reasonable email from Ipse
Sorry, I’m not clear as to what you are referring to as, “them,” but I’m not trying to lay blame here. I personally think that kevin never meant anyone any harm with his F-bombs. In fact, whenever any hint of confrontation came his way via posts, he would always respond in a passive manner so as to not create waves. He always gave me the sense that despite his language, he is an otherwise polite and amiable guy. His style is all it is when he is casually speaking here on FTC. I have to guess that kevin decided to stop because he probably doesn’t want to come into conflict with anyone while not wanting to curb his style.
I get that a number of us are offended by cursing. Instead of insulting kevin or otherwise imposing your collective will upon him, just skim over his posts or use the app mentioned in this thread as well as on this forum’s main page.
With me, I hate it when posters constantly inject negative snarky BS in their posts - constantly. But instead of getting my panties all bunched up, I just skip their posts and move on. It’s their style and I guess their right, and I choose not to invest any of my time or effort in acknowledging pettiness. I move on.
Really? I think that is exactly what it is - but that doesn’t mean it is a bad thing at all. Sometimes being passive aggressive is the noblest thing to be: “of or denoting a type of behavior or personality characterized by indirect resistance to the demands of others and an avoidance of direct confrontation”
CiaoBob:
if members of a group criticize you and you choose to withdraw from the group as a result, how is that “passive-aggressive?”
he is under NO moral OBLIGATION/RESPONSIBILITY to stay.
this LACK OF OBLIGATION is what takes the withdrawal firmly OUT of the realm of passive-aggression.
kevin has absolutely NO RESPONSIBILITY TO STAY and certainly no responsibility to change his style to conform.
NONE of us are under any sort of contract/social compact to maintain the connection.
we all participate for only ONE REASON:::
we stay because the interaction GIVES US PLEASURE.
when any members of such a group indulge their desire to control and criticize other members, it seems to me that withdrawal of those being criticized would be the most likely logical consequence.
imho, there is no need to bandy about psychological terms that don’t even apply because a FUNDAMENTAL element of the definition of the term is ABSENT.
I don’t know.
I think his use of fuck and fucking and odd punctuation is a style, and I suppose, from that perspective it is a way of garnering attention. I have been posting alongside kevin since the beginning and the style we are discussing developed slowly. If chowhound is still searchable you can look at posts of his from a decade ago and the voice was very different, quite fucking normal actually. And then like many artistic things I think he stumbled into a voice and got (mostly) positive attention from others and it grew and solidified - it was fresh and unique and funny, and even to his ardent fans like me, sometimes a bit annoying. But to the non-fans it really grated. I appreciate @bulavinaka 's literary comparison but I wold go with something more like a Howard Stern or, perhaps,a Tarantino. Meant to be funny and a bit shocking. As well as smart.
I never followed Howard Stern so I will take your word for it. Tarantino seems the opposite of kevin in that while he seems somewhat PG for the most part in person, his movies manifest every rough edge and underbelly that the darkest of worlds can conger up - in a good way.
I’ll also say I liked him better when he wrote without the F bombs and odd punctuation.
Those who insist on others being tolerant of Kevin are being oddly intolerant themselves.
Kevin is a great writer and wealth of information for sure. But he also can and has conveyed them without excessive profanity and odd punctuation. If he would rather not post at all than curtail a few F bombs, that’s his prerogative. No one said it had to be all or nothing besides him.
Finally, I don’t find the board more boring at all. @paranoidgarliclover, @A5KOBE, @PorkyBelly, and @Chowseeker1999 and many more are visiting new and old spots with ample pictures and wonderful reports. There is more actual eating and reporting on here recently than I can rememeber in a long time…even on the old boards.
@ipsedixit, As long as there is public moderation and a want for transparency, please also publish the names of the people that complained about Kevin. Or maybe those individuals can identify themselves instead? Fair is fair.
It seems like @ipsedixit handled a delicate situation with tact. There are a hundred ways for someone to respond to a request like the one made in the post. One can discuss, try to moderate, say no, whatever.
Or he can just leave, which is apparently what happened. But the latter approach, given the post that was sent, could be seen as passive aggressive. Although it could just be a heartfelt desire to stop giving a fuck.
